I hate you Walmart, PLUS the Best Chinese place that I don't want to tell you about!

Dear Walmart,
I hate you with a hatred that i didn't i know I could hold in my soul. Here is why:
The DVD player broke, but it's not just a dvd player. It the surround sound system, it's our entertainment unit. it's our cartoon to toddler delivery system! So we went to Walmart early one Friday morning. It's the new Walmart. It's one of those huge SuperStore type places that make me want to curl up in the fetal position. Too much Stuff!!!!
So we shop for awhile, being waited on by the poor AV staff who know nothing about anything. One of them doesn't actually speak much english and I felt super bad for him. And then we find our new system. It's on sale because it's the floor model, but they claim it works plus it is over 50% off!! It doesn't have a remote so they throw in a universal one for free!!! this all takes over an hour (they don't know how to ring it in. Sometimes they just stand there and stare at us.) But we get it and get out of that god forsaken place.
Ever hooked up a surround sounds system before? How about take one down. Ever done both in on evening while pregnant and icky feeling? Ya, don't. It's a stupid idea. I finally get it all set up and go to program the remote. Doesn't Fucking work! I spend more time on the remote than the actual set up! We ended up going to walmart two more times that week, once to get a new remote and then again to return the whole thing. They stole hours from my life and I want them back!

Alright, you waded through the venom in my soul, here is the Chinese review:

There is this place. I have been going there since I was to young to remember. It's one of those places that has hunks of dead animals hanging in the window. Until recently they only accepted cash ( I miss that, it really kept people out.) and no one there spoke English. It's called Wah Lai Yuen and it is the only place in town to get Wonton Noodle soup and BBQ Pork.
Yes, they have other things. They're buns are great. They have those combo plates that people like and they are insanely big. The $13 is a pretty clear indication but still, the portion size is big enough for two or three. But the wonton noodle makes me swoon. the broth is like an elixir that makes me feel light and happy. i don't want to know what's in the soup , that would probably ruin everything. And the service, well it's all about the love. The yelling Chinese women love. There is no formality, you walk in they gesture to a table (possibly clean) and drop off some menus. When you close your menus they ask what you want and then leave. After they bring your food, they don't check to see how it is, they just let you eat it. they drop off the bill when they clear your dishes, you pay and go. It is cheap and easy and has a homey feel that i crave almost weekly.

Please don't tell anyone about this place. It is one of Victoria's best Kept secrets.
And if you haven't yet, check out Urbanspoon Victoria! The link is below.
Urbanspoon Rocks!

The Name of my Blog

Ok, so just a quick note about the name of this blog and then I will share my awesome chicken recipe with you. (You? Who are you? Maybe you are just Michelle?)
The name of this blog is because i always get food in my shirt. This may be for a wealth of reasons. Maybe my shirts are too low cut. Maybe I am a very messy eater. It's probably the first one, but i didn't want you all to think I'm some kind of skank. I'm not! That's just how shirts ride on me. I can't help the fullness of my bust. I admit, i kinda like it. But there you go, after almost every meal, i will find something in my shirt. Kinda gross.

Easy Yummy Thai Chicken

Ever had the spicy Thai Peanut Noodle at Noodle Box? This is better, Cheaper and sooo easy! Thanks for the base recipe that became this Michelle ( Michelle is getting so many shout outs in here, i should get paid for ad space!)

You will need:
Chicken ( you can use breasts or bone in pieces. I like pieces because they are cheap and the bone adds flavour and thickness to the sauce. Yum!)
oil
onion
garlic
ginger
shitake mushrooms (just 4 or so, don't want to break the bank)
chicken stock (one cheap can of the Asian stuff works well)
coconut milk (same as above)
peanut butter (what ever you got, smooth, crunchy, natural, insane Skippy sweetened)
Fish Sauce (this is Thai people! Fish sauce is a must!)Asian condiments ( I love the fridge forage! What do you have? Hoisin, soy sauce, mirin, sweet chili, spicy chili, oyster, sesame oil? get creative!!)
Veggies ( I like snow peas, sweet peppers and broccoli because they all cook at the same speed)
Lime (one for the sauce and one to cut up for garnish. fancy!)
Cilantro (Dear cilantro haters, you are silly. You actually like this stuff when you don't know it's there.)

Cooking:

Ok, oil in Wok (woks are awesome. go get one if you don't have one) hear it and start browning the chicken. I like a medium brown, try not to burn the pan or yourself. This is just for flavour, don't try to do it until the chicken is cooked through. Take out the chicken and add the onions and let them cook for a few until they are softer than raw onions. Add garlic, ginger and mushrooms. How much garlic and ginger? I don't know, how much do you like? Ok, Cook until you get that nice shitake smell going or until the onions are browning and you are getting a little bored. this should be done over med low heat. Burnt onions taste gross. Add the chicken stock, almost the whole can. stir. add coconut milk, almost the whole can. stir. add peanut butter. stir a more until it's in there. How much peanut butter? Taste it and figure it out! there's no raw chicken in there right now, so don't be a pussy about it. Ok, enough of the peanut flavour is there so put the other flavour stuff in, just hold off on the lime and cilantro. Tasting good? put the chicken back in, put it on simmer and let it go. check it every five or ten, give it a stir, turn the chicken but no more tasting. Raw chicken is back on the scene. after about 30 minutes toss in the veggies. they will take about 5 or 10 minutes depending on if you have teeth or not. When it's all cooked squeeze in some lime, toss on some cilantro and serve it over rice or noodle.

Note: if you use breast pieces this whole process will go faster but you will have to thicken at the end with cornstarch and cold water.

Ok, go eat this!

Next blog, bitching about walmart!! yay!

A first post, an explanation and so much more!

Welcome to my first post. You may be wondering what kind of odd blog you've stumbled upon. This is a foodie blog, but also it is a mom blog, a pregnant chick blog, a hard working chick who likes to have fun blog. Can you dig it?
So, little background: I'm a mom and pregnant with my second child. i love to cook and I love to eat. I especially like to eat at amazing restaurants. Too bad I live in Victoria, hey? Ok, there are some and I will chronicle my yummy times in them. But here is the thing, I take a toddler out for food sometimes. Some of you really hate this. Too bad. You were a toddler once and the world put up with you. And my toddler is well behaved and a very nice and smart person, unlike many adults I know. So no, i don't care if I get dirty looks from you baby haters when I walk into a nice restaurant. Because, here is the thing, i get them at kid friendly places too. Why do you child haters go there? for the food??? Ok, that is my rant for today, but be warned, your looks will only make me more bold in my dinning.
So, my toddler came back from a little trip yesterday and to celebrate we took her to her favorite restaurant: Red Robbins. I don't hate RR's. Sometimes I even enjoy it. It's consistent and that's more than I can say for a lot of places in this city. But not this time! First of all, they tried to seat us at one of those really high tables around the bar area. with a toddler. do you see the issue here. One of two things could come of this. My child could fall or she could treat her chair and table like a jungle gym. Neither of those options make for a nice dinner. We had to wait another 15 minutes. Fine, busy night. I get it. So we get a seat and the hostess is very nice and everything is fine until... ok, how long does it take our server to take our drink orders? He has introduced himself. but not asked. 15 minutes. That's how long. Our drink orders (apple juice and two club sodas) then take another 20. We haven't even ordered yet! Again, i understand that when a place is busy things take time, but seriously?!?
OK, deep breath. We order. Since I am pregnant i decide that i HAVE TO HAVE POUTINE. that's just the way it is. I ask about it and the server is totally noncommittal. "ya, it's good. the cheese curds are real." all said with a shrug. I order it thinking maybe he just isn't a fan. 30 minutes later ( i kid you not) we get our food. THERE IS NO GRAVY ON MY POUTINE!!! what the hell is this? are they trying to fuck with my head. there are cheese curds so the knew i want some kind of fry addition. I want it to be know that the whole time this is going on i am calm and sweet. I don't get angry or admonish anyone. I simply ask for gravy. Our server (not the original, maybe he went on a break) returns quickly with gravy. ya, it's not great. I should have saved my craving for the Better Poutine places in town, but I'll take what i get.
The Bill comes and THEY CHARGE ME FOR GRAVY!
I didn't yell or scream or lose my mind. I pointed out the error and paid my bill. And then, known to the staff, I put a curse on the franchise. Just a little one. Maybe a bug problem, maybe a manager gets caught in a scandal that rocks the very foundation of their family restaurant.
And there we are, first blog done. More a rant. Sorry bout that.
Recipe for the yummiest chicken ever comming sooooooon!